I Had These Beers and Didn’t Get A Buzz, I’m Broken

Zapped On Zappa
Alvarado Street XPA
King Sue IPA
Bare bottle
Why you guys give me no buzz!?

The other day I had the four beers you see above. That’s enough beer to do a little damage, right? One should feel some damn thing after those.

Yeah, well, I didn’t. Never caught a magical buzz all evening.

Have I become THAT tolerant of beer? Is my ATL (Alcohol Tolerance Level) at scary levels? Let’s break it down.

Beer One:

  • Alvarado Street’s “XPA” Pale Ale. 5%. 16oz. Drank around 5PM

Beer Two:

  • Original Pattern Brewing’s “Zapped On Zappa”. IPA. 7%. 16oz. Drank around 6PM.

Okay, so, here is where the buzz should be happening. But at that moment I stopped for dinner, took a jog-walk with the child, did the dishes.

Any chance of a nice buzz is interrupted by life.

Beer Three:

  • Bare Bottle Beer Co. “Dusty JR” Hazy Pale Ale. 5.6%. 16oz can. Drank around 8PM. 

Beer Four:

  • Toppling Goliath Brewing Co. “King Sue” DIPA. 7.8%. 16oz can. Drank around 9:30PM.

Here is where things are a little cloudy. I think there is some falling asleep in front of the TV happening at this time. If a buzz was there to be enjoyed, I napped through it.

So, maybe I am not broken, my system for getting a buzz is? 

I remember enjoying the beers, that’s the main thing. But if getting a buzz is also the intent, a little more focus is needed.

Thanks for coming to my Beer Talk.

How To Drink Beer In The Morning [and stay present all day]

I didn’t mean for this to be an experiment but it turned out to be.

On Friday The Perfect Pour celebrated its 400th episode. We all took the day off work so we could podcast live, on the same day the show gets released.

Originally the plan was to do it at 6AM since that’s the time we jokingly claim we record. We ended up landing on 10AM. 

We would start drinking beer at TEN IN THE FREAKING MORNING.

That’s fine if you have nothing to do the rest of the day, but I had some things.

  • A kid in the house doing virtual learning all day with a lot of homework to catch up on.
  • A podcast to edit.
  • Support for my wife going to get her second vaccination shot and wanting to be able to drive her home in case it makes her feel funny.
  • Dinner.
  • A newsletter to write.

Point is, enough going on for the need to be alert (not drunk or sleepy) the rest of the day.

BUT, I wanted to drink the same amount of beer I always do on the show, regardless of time.

Well the day is nearly done and I’m here to tell you, I did it. I made it through the day with all things accomplished.

But how did I do it? I feel the need to pass on this sort of Day Drinking Guide to you – just in case you need to drink beer in the morning sometime and still have a productive day.

Start with a good base. A good setup.

That usually means a strong breakfast. A thick one. I did not though. I had a piece of cheese, a piece of sourdough bread and three cups of coffee. That’s a bad base.

10:00AM

The podcast begins, as I drink three 16oz beers all the way down. That was about three hours tops. The beers (along with my neighbor’s cat) are pictured above.

  • Core Values from Coronado Brewing & Karl Strauss. Apple WCIPA, 6.8% ABV.
  • All Good from Loomis Basin Brewing. HIPA, 7.2% ABV.
  • Wakey Wakey from New Glory Brewing. Oatmeal Coffee Porter at 6.5%.

12:30PM

The podcast is over. I have a meat heavy pizza from Pieology.

Water. Diet soda. Another water. Another diet soda. Crackers.

3:00PM

I’m basically sober. The buzz from the morning beers is gone. Just slightly tired.

It’s time for the vax backup, but it turns out I’m not needed.

3:30PM

I could start drinking again but don’t. I know I need to stay awake to write, help with school and stay fresh for diner. Be a human and stuff.

5:30PM

Pick up diner. Chinese from China Bistro (it’s a takeout kinda day).

I have more water and soda with my Mongolian Beef and fried rice.

I’m fully reset and ready for beers again, almost as if I had not drank earlier.

7:30PM

  • Amarilla Gorilla from Smog City Brewing. IPA, 7.4%.
  • Soft & Fluffy from Temblor Brewing. Marshmallow IPA. 8.0%.

11:30PM

I hit the wall. Normally I would have had another beer at this point but no interest now and can’t stay awake.

It’s over, but mission accomplished. 

Significant morning drinking and a full day of being present, can be accomplished.

Hope this dorky guide helps you sometime.

A Picture Of A Dive: Billymark’s West NYC

At first glance I thought this was a picture of a mini-mart (or a bodega as they like to call them in NY). It’s pure dive artistry.

It reminds me that I have a soft spot for dive-y marts with a little bit of character. And before the Pandemic, I was trying to figure out what to do with that soft spot, creatively.

Since the Pandemic though, I don’t go in them. Too small of an air space to breathe if I don’t have to, ya know.

But now I know, once all spaces become safe again, I’ll be doing posts on here, dedicated to the little marts I experience throughout my day.

Oh yeah, so it turns out the above picture is of a dive bar in NYC, not a mart.

As you can see it’s called Billymark’s West and doesn’t look too bad inside as this picture by NY.Eater.com suggests:

They even did a write up on the place. Hope it survives the COVID with its Labat’s Blue selection intact.

Good Beers To Drink Outside

It’s the time to be outside and popular beer writer, @BeerBabe, put out a question to Beer Twitter recently:

What’s a good day drinking, patio or simply outdoors beer? Hmmmm.

My first reaction is almost always, light. A pale ale around 5% or a session IPA.

This is the only time (outside, during the day), when I would think about having a Lager or Pilsner as well. Maybe even a good European Lager.

Carla’s followers have some opinions too so I highlighted some of the more interesting ones:

A Peak Organic Fresh Cut, ehh? Noted.

Hidden Beer Cooler | How To Hide Your Beer

We’ve all done it. You bring good beer to a party or you have good beer at yours. You want everyone to enjoy themselves and maybe even discover a beer they have not tried.

BUT!

You have beers in that ice-chest exclusively for you. Ones you only want to drink. You got to bury them or come up with a plan.

Let’s brainstorm some ideas. Even if some are obvious.

Cooler With a Hidden Compartment

I really wanted to find a magic cooler that has a false bottom that one could easily get to and not draw attention. That does not seem to exsist.

But there is one dude that (if you’re good with working with wood) shows you how to make a small hidden compartment in the lid of an ice-chest:

Yeah, I’m not going through all that. Plus, it is not practical enough to keep something as big as beer cans or bottles and hold something that would keep that false top cold. Moving on.

Hidden Beer Cooler

Now we’re going to try and flat out hide the cooler. Put it in an odd spot that does not draw attention to where you’re going, but also can be accesses by you without hassle.

  • IN THE BEDROOM. This would be weird to do at somebody else’s place, but totally possible at your own.
  • THE TOILET TANK. I suppose you could fashion some sort of cooler that would go inside the tank of the main toilet. Maybe big enough for some cans but still let the toilets flusher still work probably. This is hardcore and would require ingenuity I don’t have.
  • COOLER IN THE BUSHES. The grassy knol where there was a second cooler. Hide it in the trees, dude. “Why does Mikey keep going over into the bushes?” “Yeah, and now he somehow has a new beer?”
  • WITH THE PURSES. Get one of them cooler bags, one that looks like maybe it’s a mom purse. Leave it amongst the other “bags” and hopefully nobody will see you checking the coat and bags area every 20 minutes.
  • BEER CLOSET. If you are lucky enough to have a walk-in closet, you now have a Beer Closet. This may require you to sneak away and do some chugging.