Why Do Brewers Love Lagers and Pilsners So Damn Much!?

Because brewers are so fucking bored with flavor and the work, they just want pilsners and lagers.

It’s a good test. A test to see if the brewer knows what the hell he is doing. If he’s got a good lager or pilsner then he probably can brew.

I had always thought that tasting a brewer’s pale is how you judge.

Brewers are annoyed that you like flavors. You dick Beer Geeks, liking all that damn flavor! Screw. You. Guys. I’m going going home with  Zero Hopped Pilsner.

Give us what we want, you brewing bros. Stop trying to shove your Pilsner on is. Homebrew your lagers and drink them all day for all I care.

You’re a damn Pro. And being pro means you have to make some stuff that is interesting and fun. There is nothing fucking interesting and fun about a clean lager.

If you want to be relive your Budweiser drinking days, then go get a Budwieser and leave us be. Where is my Mosaic hopped marshmellow hazy?

Lagers are as boring.

Stay home. Make lagers all day in your garage if they’re so fucking awesome. I’m at your taproom with cash and I want some pales with FUCKING HOPS!

I want some stouts WITH FUCKING ADJUNKS BECAUSE ADJUNKS TASTE GOOD!

I don’t care if you think I’m a child, I alreay know I’m a child and I don’t have to eat my veggies. I can eat and drink whatever I damn well please and I want to give you money for a beer with a shit ton of Mosaic and I don’t need to see your eye rolls.

I don’t need to hear your sighs. Just make the damn beer and be happy you get to do something you love and I get to pay you for it.

END RANT! I love you brewer guys. Just beer drinker venting attempting comedy.

xoxo

-Mikey

Kinda sorta related:

Author: mikeytoppour

Lover of Indie Beer, blogging and podcasting. Star Wars is pretty cool too.

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