Summer Of Slush: Beer Slushies Are Good For Indie Craft Beer

Beer Geeks need to let the whole shamming of Beer Slushies subside.

I totally get the shaming, but, slushed beers are delicious. I hate saying that, but dammit, they are.

Three big reasons I like it:

  1. They keep money flowing in craft beer.
  2. Big Beer can do nothing. There is no counter. You think Texas Roadhouse is going to get a Bud Light Slush machine? Actually they might. I should shut up. Shit, I’d be surprised if there ISN’T a beer slush machince the next time I go to Texas Roadhouse or whatever.
  3. Sometimes your significant other might not be all that into beer like you so it’s hard to get them to come down to the taproom with you. But if there is a beer slush available, might be a little easier to convince them.

Aren’t breweries using beer they are having problems selling to blend into slushies?

Yeah, they probably are in many cases. What, are you a Beer Slush Snob now? Cool. Demand better from your slushes. Otherwise, what does it matter? Just drink it or don’t. Hell, it’s more interesting than a simple Lager, that brewers seem to love so much. Yeah I said it.

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Why Do Brewers Love Lagers and Pilsners So Damn Much!?

Because brewers are so fucking bored with flavor and the work, they just want pilsners and lagers.

It’s a good test. A test to see if the brewer knows what the hell he is doing. If he’s got a good lager or pilsner then he probably can brew.

I had always thought that tasting a brewer’s pale is how you judge.

Brewers are annoyed that you like flavors. You dick Beer Geeks, liking all that damn flavor! Screw. You. Guys. I’m going going home with  Zero Hopped Pilsner.

Give us what we want, you brewing bros. Stop trying to shove your Pilsner on is. Homebrew your lagers and drink them all day for all I care.

You’re a damn Pro. And being pro means you have to make some stuff that is interesting and fun. There is nothing fucking interesting and fun about a clean lager.

If you want to be relive your Budweiser drinking days, then go get a Budwieser and leave us be. Where is my Mosaic hopped marshmellow hazy?

Lagers are as boring.
Continue reading “Why Do Brewers Love Lagers and Pilsners So Damn Much!?”

5 Things Untappd Should Do Right Damn Now!

Untappd

I am not one to be afraid to nerd out about Untappd. And I’d be willing to stay on the Untappd App longer (which is what all sites and Apps want from you) if the Untappd Overlords would add these five things.

1. Make It Easy To Do Late Check-Ins.

Half of my check-ins are after the fact. You know, you’re in a situation (like going to dinner with non-beer geeks) and you don’t want to be on your phone, checking in beers. Or you are partying too hard and don’t want to stop and use Untappd.

But later, you want credit for having that beer. So you check-in even though you’re not currently dinking. There is never been a button or added feature to idicate this. What I do and most people do is indicate in the comments that it’s a late check-in. Not the worst thing in the world but also slightly annoying.

2. Give Us One Minute Of Video.

Is that too crazy? Instagram has video so it’s obviously possible. But do I really want it? I don’t have the energy to watch IGTV videos. Barely can watch Instagram Stories.

So why am I asking for video on Untappd? It goes back to wanting to not leave the App. Being able to give a one minute review of the beer could make things more interesting on Untappd, that is for certain.

3. Simplify Finding People.

Take away the extra step in searching for users. When you first search a user name on Untappd it searches through your current friends. If you are trying to find a new-to-you person, you then have to hit the “add” button at the top right and search again. Just make one search, yeah?

4. Change “Beers” back to “Uniques”.

On your profile, it used to compile your basic check-in stats as beers and uniques. Beers is how many times you checked in a beer. Uniques are how many different beers you’ve had. Now, mysteriously, it’s “Check-ins” that represent the number of beers you drank and “Beers” for the number of unique beers you’ve drank. Weird and lame.

5. Give Us A Global and Local Leaderboard

A, Most Untappd Check-ins leader board. This could get ugly. But I really would like to know who had the most check-ins on Untappd. I can guarantee it is not someone that works at Untappd.

Maybe something like Reddit does where you can be upvoted for how good your reviews are or how interesting your check-ins are.

Anyway, Untappd. I’ll keep thinking of junk. You keep listening. Leave a comment if there is something you would like Untappd to do.

Sally Citra from Mikkeller SD: HAD IT!

Sally Citra IPA 16oz can

Sally Citra from Mikkeller Brewing San Diego. I had it. Bought a four pack. Here are thoughts about that.

Let me start by saying, I judge beers by how they taste… because that’s how people judge… beer things. But I also judge them by their price. I guess we all do that, either concisely or sub-concisely.

If I’m going to pay $18 for a 4-pack of 16oz beers, I want socks being blown off. My socks stayed on for Mikkeller SD’s, Sally Citra. But, I might have had to pull my socks up ever so slightly.

Definitely not a bad beer. A nice beer, in fact, it’s a very clean beer. I love good clean Citra heavy West Coast IPA. But, the price point really hurt it.

Sally Citra is not worth the price.

UNLESS you have some money in your Beer Budget for exploring. In which case I am very jealous of you because building up a beer budget that has a sub-category for exploring is a big goal of mine.

Here is where my judgment of the beer becomes negative.

The price point. For the 4-pack of 16oz cans, I paid $17.99 at Whole Foods Market in Fresno. Which can be a sorta fair price for a good 4-pack of Indie Beer. I’m not opposed to paying that much. But I have to stretch dollars the best I can so I really take a risk when those 4-packs get up there in price.

Truth is, I would be glowing about this beer if it was $12.99 for the 4-pack. But $17.99, right or wrong, ruins judging the beer in an honest way. Sorry Mikkeller SD and Whole Foods.

Let’s see what others are saying on Untappd:

@RickAus10

and well that is about the extent of the reviews on Untappd, outside of “tasty hazy”, which is sometimes the extent of my reviews on Untappd so I shouldn’t judge.

To give a hazy sum up, it’s a nice beer that is overpriced. If you see it on draft somewhere, give it a try. If you have a nice beer budget and a love for Citra, give it a try. Otherwise, don’t worry yourself about Sally.

What Does ‘Crispies’ Mean in Beer?

What are “crispies” in the beer geek world?

If we are in the realm of beer geek terms, when one uses the slang “crispies” they are referring to macro beers or pilsners like a Coors Light on Bud Light or other boring corporate beers.

Also may be simply referring to beers that are kept in the crisper bin of the refrigerator. No space on the shelf so you start storing beers in the crisper.

Don’t forget the Bros and how the term crispies relate! You call them “crispy bois”. At least you could call them that.

I have two bins full of bad “crispies” waiting for a really desperate day. A day I hope never comes. At least now I know what to call them.

*Parks N Rec beer meme pictured above found on RareBeerMeme’s Instagram feed.