Ambient Review: Heady Topper

Heady Topper in my driveway

If you have not seen an Ambient Review yet: It’s more about what I’m experiencing during the time it takes to drink the beer than what the actual beer tastes like.

Setup: I had boneless chicken wings (I can’t handle eating it off-the-bone) from Lazy Dog restaurant and a Diet Pepsi – yes I am a health nut.

Drinking Start Time: 10:00 PM

I open the beer and take a sip. On this occasion I am drinking from the can as The Alchemist basically demands. This is more about laziness and not wanting to get a glass than listening to the can’s demands.

First sip is strong. I feel like we forget Heady and Pliny are doubles. Maybe it’s just me that forgets.

I forgot to roll the can. I’m a believer in can rolling to mix a hazy up, I usually forget to do it though.

10:10ish: I am helping my daughter with getting one of our cats from her room to the outside. The cats are newish and our dog wants to eat them so we have to take measures to keep them separated.

Royal Cake Eater, Elaine, reacts

10:15ish: Take another sip of my Heady. Watching Seinfeld. It’s the one where Elaine eats Petterman’s $2,900 cake. I’d buy Elaine any cake she wants – #crush.

This is also the episode with George and the Frogger machine and Jerry dates the Sentence Finisher.

10:30ish: Some more sips of the Heady. Then things get fuzzy as I fall asleep on the floor – sometimes the floor and a pillow is more comfortable than a chair.

11:11: I wake up to another episode of Seinfeld but I am not sure which one. My beer is warm now. I power through some gulps and mostly finish it because I would feel too much shame if I completely wasted a Topper.

Thanks for coming to this Ambient Review, look for more on this blog soon!

What Does Rolling A Beer Do? [File Under: Hazy Beer Tips]

What is rolling your beer anyway?
Hazy beer “Death To False Beer” is a good beer for rolling.

Do you already know about rolling your beer or is this the first time you’re hearing about it?

I recently was listening to Three B Zine podcast and heard a guy from Stone Brewing talk about rolling a can of Hazy IPA or NE style (whatever term you prefer) beer before opening it.

Oh, yes, I have seen hazebros do this beer rolling on Instagram but did not think there was a point to it other than it makes for a slightly fun and quick video.

There is actually a point to it.

Why? What does rolling a beer do?

It breaks up the sediment. If a beer has been sitting around a bit or is excessive in its hazy New England nature, there will be lots of chunky goodness to mix in with the rest of the beer.

Rolling it brings out the all the flavors.

So, when you roll it, it’s like shaking it up without shaking it up because actually shaking a beer is bad – unless you just won the World Series and you’re pouring beer over your teammate in the locker room.

Rolling it mixes all the things. The sediment. The haze. The juicy.

Is it okay to drink beer with sediment?

Yeah, dude. Totally. That’s full of protein probably.

Actually, it’s the yeast. It is heavy and likes to rest at the bottom of your can or bottle. Yeast gets worn out and lazy.

Good news though, that sediment apparently has plenty of B-vitamins so you’re going to be super healthy after drinking it. “No honey, I don’t need to take my multivitamin today, I have my juicy beer here, I’m good.”

What is the best way to roll your beer?

Be nice to your beer. Take your favorite can or crowler of hazy, or bottle of old beer. Playfully roll it across the table a few times. Open. Pour. Enjoy your haze…bro.

If you do it right and don’t get too crazy with your roll, it won’t explode on you, it’ll just be ready to enjoy.

Enough talking about it. Let’s try it because I am getting thirsty and I need something chunky and juicy: